Ministry School (A). Lesson 3. A Culture of Honor

Lesson 3. A Culture of Honor. Ministry School (A) of Father’s Blessing Church, Kyiv, Ukraine.

School Contents

Lesson Objective: To understand why it is important in the Church to honor those who bear spiritual responsibility, are more mature in the faith, and faithfully serve God, and to learn to build a culture of honor that reflects the order of the Kingdom of God.

Key Verse:

1 Thessalonians 5:12–13
“And we urge you, brothers and sisters, to respect those who work hard among you, who are over you in the Lord and admonish you. Hold them in the highest regard in love because of their work.”

All members of the Body of Christ are equal in worth before God, but they have different functions and measures of responsibility.

Honor is not simply good manners.
It is a spiritual attitude toward God’s order.

If a person does not know how to honor others, they are poorly prepared for leadership. For leadership in the Church begins not with power, but with humility.

After some time, a lack of honor usually manifests itself in the following ways:

🔴 The person stops receiving instruction.
🔴 They begin arguing not for the sake of truth, but for self-affirmation.
🔴 They become accustomed to speaking lightly and carelessly about those who are more mature.
🔴 They do not value the work of those who carried responsibility before them.
🔴 They compare themselves with others and lose their gratitude.
🔴 They may destroy trust within the team and the Church.

It is important to understand: the problem is not that a person has an opinion of their own. The problem begins when that opinion is placed above God's order.

Being mature means knowing how to honor a person's position and work, even when you do not agree with them in everything.

Honor is not blindness.
Honor is having the right heart before God and people.

FOUR BIBLICAL EXAMPLES

1. David and Saul

David is one of the strongest examples of honor in the Bible.

Saul acted wrongly.
He envied David, pursued him, and wanted to kill him.
David had the opportunity to take revenge, but he did not.

1 Samuel 24:7
“May the Lord forbid that I should do such a thing to my master, the Lord's anointed.”

David did not justify Saul's evil.
He did not say that Saul was acting rightly.
But David did not allow his heart to become vengeful, evil, and contemptuous.

This is a very important balance.

David respected God's appointment even when the person in that position acted wrongly.

Conclusion from the example:
Honor is tested not when a leader is perfect, but when you see his weaknesses.
A mature person knows how to discern a mistake without allowing contempt into their heart.

However: David’s example does not mean that a believer should remain near a dangerous, cruel, or destructive leader. David honored God’s established order, but he also fled from Saul, did not allow himself to be killed, and did not participate in wrongdoing. Honor does not mean tolerating evil.

2. Elisha and Elijah

1 Kings 19:21 “...and he arose, and went after Elijah, and ministered unto him.”

Before Elisha became a great prophet, he spent many years alongside Elijah as a servant—not seeking position or recognition, but as a disciple who served, helped, and learned.

When the time came to part, Elisha did not step aside. He stayed with Elijah to the end:

2 Kings 2:9–12 Elisha asked for a double portion of Elijah’s spirit—and received it not because he demanded it, but because he remained faithful and respectful until the last day of his mentor’s ministry. When Elijah was taken up, Elisha cried out: “My father, my father!”—that is what he called his spiritual mentor.

Conclusion from the example: Honor for a spiritual mentor is expressed not in beautiful words, but in a willingness to serve, remain close, and learn—even through simple, unnoticed tasks, long before the time comes to lead a ministry independently.

3. Jesus and John the Baptist

John the Baptist was Christ’s forerunner.
He was not greater than Jesus, and therefore said:

John 3:30
“He must increase, but I must decrease.”

But look at how Jesus spoke about John.

Matthew 11:11
“Among those born of women there has not risen anyone greater than John the Baptist.”

Jesus did not devalue John.
He did not say, “Now My ministry has begun, so the previous minister is no longer important.”
He honored the work of the one who served before Him.

This is a powerful lesson for young leaders.

A new wave of ministry should not humiliate those who served before.
A new gift should not despise the work of the past.
A new generation should not build itself on criticism of the previous generation.

Yes, the previous generation may have made mistakes. But the new one will make mistakes too.
Yes, not everything was perfect. But not everything will be perfect among their successors either.
If people worked, prayed, taught, endured, built, and carried the burden, that must not be despised. They walked a difficult path and remained faithful; this must not be devalued.

Conclusion from the example: A mature minister knows how to honor another person’s work, even when his own ministry is moving forward.

4. The Church and Elders

In the New Testament, the Church was not a disorganized crowd of people.
There were apostles, elders, mentors, ministers, and responsible leaders.

The Bible says:

Hebrews 13:17
“Obey your leaders and submit to them, for they keep watch over your souls as those who must give an account.”

This is a very serious passage.

It shows two sides:

The first side is that believers should respect and obey their spiritual mentors.
The second side is that mentors will give an account to God.

In other words, authority in the Church is not a privilege for boasting.
It is a responsibility before God.

1 Pet. 5:2–3
“Shepherd God’s flock… not lording it over those entrusted to you, but being examples to the flock.”

A shepherd must not lord it over others.
But the Church must not despise pastoral ministry.

These are two errors:

• a leader abuses authority;
• people despise authority.

The Bible rejects both errors.

Conclusion from the example: There must be order in the Church: ministers do not lord it over others but set an example; believers do not despise them but honor them and cooperate with them.

HONOR AND HIERARCHY

The word “hierarchy” may sound harsh, so it must be explained correctly.

Biblical order is not a system of superiority, control, and human importance. It is an order of responsibility, service, and accountability before God.

Not everyone in the Church bears the same responsibility.

Not everyone should teach.
Not everyone should lead.
Not everyone should make the same decisions.
Not everyone will give the same account.

James 3:1
“My brethren, let not many of you become teachers, knowing that we shall receive a stricter judgment.”

The greater the responsibility, the stricter the account before God.

Therefore, honoring a minister is not worshiping a person.
It is recognizing their burden, labor, and responsibility.

• If a person bears greater responsibility, they must not be taken lightly.
• If a person is spiritually more mature, they must not be listened to as though they were just anyone.
• If a person has served faithfully for many years, their labor must not be devalued or placed on the same level as that of new, untested people.

At the same time: Honor does not mean covering sin, tolerating abuse, participating in falsehood, or remaining silent when people are being destroyed. Biblical honor does not cancel truth, conscience, or God's holiness.

Jesus explicitly forbade His disciples from building leadership according to the pattern of the world, where those in authority lord it over people. In the Kingdom of God, greatness is measured not by how others serve you, but by how you serve others. Therefore, honoring a leader does not make them more valuable than other people; it recognizes their responsibility. And the leader must prove their maturity not by demanding honor, but by serving as an example.

SIGNS OF A CULTURE OF HONOR

1. A person knows how to listen

James 1:19
“Let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger.”

Disrespect often begins not with an action but with an inner attitude:
“I already understand everything,”
“I don’t need an explanation,”
“I know better.”

A respectful person knows how to listen.

2. A Person Is Careful with Their Words

Eph. 4:29
“Let no corrupt word proceed out of your mouth.”

Rudeness, mockery, sarcasm, and public humiliation are not spiritual boldness.
They are immaturity and pride.

You can speak the truth without offensive words.
You can disagree without contempt.
You can correct without humiliating.

3. A Person Is Grateful for the Work of Others

Heb. 13:7
“Remember your leaders who preached the Word of God to you, and, considering the outcome of their way of life, imitate their faith.”

An ungrateful person sees only shortcomings.
A grateful person sees the work, the sacrifice, and the fruit.

Gratitude protects the heart from pride.

4. A Person Serves with Accountability

A young minister should have people to whom he can say:

“See if I am doing this correctly.”
“Correct me if I am wrong.”
“Help me not to fall into pride.”

Without accountability, a gift can become dangerous.

5. A person knows how to receive correction

Prov. 12:1
“Whoever loves correction loves knowledge, but whoever hates reproof is stupid.”

If a person does not accept correction, it is too early for them to lead others.

Those who do not know how to be disciples cannot be mentors either.

FEARS AND REALITY

“What if the leader is wrong?” Respect for a position does not mean blindly agreeing with every decision. A leader can make mistakes. Even the apostle Peter was wrong, and Paul corrected him.

The Bible provides the proper procedure for questions and accusations:

1 Tim. 5:19 “Do not receive an accusation against an elder except on the testimony of two or three witnesses.”

There is a difference between raising an issue through the proper process and publicly criticizing someone and undermining their authority. David never humiliated Saul before the people.

At the same time: If a leader teaches falsehood, covers up sin, destroys people, or demands something that contradicts God, respect does not mean remaining silent. The Bible shows that even the apostle Peter was corrected by Paul. But correction should not come from contempt, rebellion, or a desire to humiliate; it should come from faithfulness to the truth, with a pure heart and through the proper process.

“But what if the older generation does not support the new generation?” This also happens. Sometimes older ministers may be afraid of change, new methods, new people, and new gifts. But young people must not turn this into an excuse for contempt, rebellion, or devaluing the previous generation.

Young people need to learn to speak respectfully, without demanding a place by force or proving their worth through criticizing their elders. If God has given a gift, He will also provide the time, the door, and confirmation through its fruit.

A healthy church is not a place where older people suppress the young, nor a place where the young despise their elders. It is a place where generations serve together: older people provide wisdom, covering, and an example, while young people bring strength, zeal, and a willingness to work.

DEBUNKING MYTHS

If You Are a Young Minister

A common mistake: thinking that honoring others humiliates you.

The reality: honor does not make you weak.
It shows that you are mature.

A gift can open a door.
But character keeps a person in ministry.

If you do not know how to honor your elders now, it will be difficult for you to lead those younger than you properly later. If you do not continue to uphold a culture of honor, you too will be despised.

If You Are an Experienced Minister

A common mistake: demanding honor while failing to set an example of humility yourself.

The reality: a biblical leader does not lord it over others but leads by example.

1 Pet. 5:3
“not lording it over God’s heritage, but being examples to the flock.”

Honor cannot be built on demands alone.
It must be supported by life, hard work, love, and example.

If You Are in a Small Church

A common mistake: thinking that a culture of honor is needed only in large churches.

The reality is that in a small church, words spread quickly, relationships are close, and dishonor quickly damages the atmosphere.

A small church especially needs respect, gratitude, and care in the words we speak.

If You Are on a Ministry Team

A common mistake: viewing the leader as an equal participant without any special responsibility.

The reality is that the leader may be an ordinary person, but his responsibility is greater.

You do not need to turn him into an inaccessible boss.
But you must not treat him as though he carries no special responsibility before God and people.

PRACTICAL STEPS

Step 1: Examine Your Heart

Answer honestly:

Whom do I find it difficult to honor?
Why?
Because of their mistakes?
Because of envy?
Because of resentment?
Because of pride?

Honor begins not with outward behavior, but with the heart.

Step 2: Examine Your Words

Recall your recent conversations about ministers, leaders, parents, and mentors.

Was there any:

• contempt?
• mockery?
• belittling?
• rudeness?
• gossip?
• desire to appear smarter?

If so, this needs to be corrected before God. If we destroy a culture of honor, we will be the first to encounter dishonor ourselves.

Step 3: Find someone to thank

Write down the names of 2–3 people through whom God has already helped you.

This could be:

• a parent;
• a pastor;
• a mentor;
• a senior minister;
• a teacher;
• someone who prayed for you;
• someone who corrected you;
• someone who gave you an opportunity to serve.

Tell him some simple words of appreciation.

Do not flatter.
Do not exaggerate.
Just thank him sincerely.

This is necessary in order to learn to live in a new culture and make it part of your character. When you start with something small and simple, things will become easier for you later.

Step 4: Learn to Ask Questions Respectfully

If you disagree, do not begin with an attack or accusations.

Instead of:
“Why did you do this so incorrectly?”

Say:
“Help me understand why this decision was made.”

Instead of:
“I think this is a mistake.”

Say:
“I may be wrong, but may I share my opinion, and you can correct me if I am not seeing everything?”

Tone matters greatly.
The same question can sound humble or accusatory.

Step 5: Correct Privately, Not Through Talking Behind Someone’s Back

If there is a serious problem—follow the biblical way.

Do not gather supporters.
Do not spread discontent.
Do not turn a personal offense into a battle.

Start with a private conversation.
Then, if necessary, take a witness with you. If that does not help, appeal to a higher-ranking minister. In other words, follow the biblical order.

BENEFITS OF A CULTURE OF HONOR

For the Minister

✅ The heart becomes softer
✅ It becomes easier to receive instruction
✅ A competitive spirit fades away
✅ God can entrust more responsibility

For the Team

✅ Less gossip and tension
✅ More trust
✅ It becomes easier to correct mistakes
✅ People are not afraid of one another
✅ Decisions are made more calmly

For the Church

✅ Generations are connected
✅ Older people do not feel discarded
✅ Young people do not grow in pride
✅ Ministers do not carry the burden alone
✅ The atmosphere becomes healthier

CONCLUSION

Honor is not weakness.
It is spiritual maturity.

Honor is not worshiping a person.
It is respecting God's order.

Main takeaway:

Those who do not know how to honor are not yet ready to lead rightly.
Those who despise order will become dangerous themselves when they gain influence.
Those who know how to honor become people through whom God can build a healthy ministry.

Honor is not fear of a person.
It is not blind submission.
It is a humble, grateful, and sober attitude toward those through whom God works.

Key takeaways from the lesson

1. Honor is recognizing God’s order, not evaluating a person’s qualities.
2. A position of responsibility, spiritual maturity, and faithful work are biblical foundations for special respect.
3. A senior leader should not only expect honor but also set an example of humility.
4. Disagreement with a leadership decision does not cancel honor—it is addressed through proper biblical order.
5. Those who have not learned to honor those above them are not ready to lead those below them.

Discussion questions

1. Whom do you find most difficult to honor, and why?
2. How can you correct a senior leader or mentor without undermining honor?
3. Recall a time when you expressed disagreement with leadership not privately, but publicly. What could you have done differently?
4. Which of the three foundations of honor—position, spiritual age, or labor—is hardest for you to honor, and why?
5. How could you express specific honor this week to someone who is over you in ministry?

Practical assignment for this week

1. Write down the names of three people through whom God has already helped you spiritually.
2. Personally thank at least one of them.
3. If you have spoken contemptuously about someone, pray and make it right before God.
4. If you have a question or disagreement with a leader, try to ask about it respectfully and personally rather than discussing it behind their back.
5. Write in your journal: What has God shown you about your heart through this topic?

PRAYER

Lord, teach me to honor the order You have established.

Cleanse my heart of pride, contempt, envy, and self-will.
Teach me to respect those who are older, those who labor, those who mentor, and those who bear responsibility.

Give me the humility to accept instruction and correction.

Help me be a person who builds up rather than tears down.
Who gives thanks rather than devalues.
Who serves according to God's order and helps others grow.

And give me a heart that blesses rather than judges those who are over me.

May my honor be for Your glory.

In the name of Jesus Christ. Amen.